The Layoff Playbook
At the start of 2023, my job adding web security services to the Microsoft Edge browser was eliminated during the wave of layoffs caused by the rise of AI reinvention. While this was an extremely exciting time in the tech industry, it was a very rough time for me, both in my career and personal life, as I had just transitioned from software engineering to product management. To make things more interesting, I was also in the process of rebuilding my life after a divorce, and just beginning to feel comfortable in my own skin. I spent the next year and a half rebuilding and reinventing my life. And while I wished for more resources to help me navigate this rough period, the complex combination of everything happening at once made it difficult to find a one-stop mentor to guide me through it.
This blog is intended to help people who have had their positions eliminated by a layoff plan a strategy to get back on their feet, take steps to seek new opportunities, rebuild their careers, and understand the journey of grief. Additionally, this guide offers advice on how to support friends going through a layoff and brief advice for leaders who find themselves in the difficult position of delivering the news.
Table of Contents
How should I read this playbook?
What are the signs that my position is at risk of being eliminated?
How does it feel to go through a layoff?
How long will the grief last for?
What strategy should I take if I am part of a layoff?
How should I structure my day?
What should I look for in my next job?
How many jobs should I be applying to? How should I track them?
How should my resume look? Should I have different versions of my resume?
How should I leverage my network?
How much money should I have in savings?
What should you do with your severance package?
What keeps you going? Where do you draw strength from?
How to support someone who just went through a layoff?
What’s the best way a leader could deliver the layoff news in a human way?
Biggest Life Lesson
Closing thoughts
How should I read this playbook?
This document is a collection of emotional experiences and practical advice to help you get back on your feet after a layoff. Not everything will be relevant to you, so I encourage you to browse the table of contents and read the sections that are most meaningful to you, in any order you see fit.
What are the signs that my position is at risk of being eliminated?
The most common denominator I’ve observed among people who went through a layoff is the looming feeling that we all needed to create new “work” to justify our positions, usually accompanied by a lack of opportunities and funding in our immediate teams. If the company is no longer investing in your team or product, and your product is not a revenue generator, there's a high likelihood that you’ll be among the first to go when times get tough. Additionally, when people in management and long-time employees start to worry about layoffs and discuss whether they have enough money for retirement, that’s a strong sign that the threat is real.
It’s important to note that being good at your job does not exempt you from being laid off. When my position was eliminated, I had a track record of year-over-year “above expectations” performance ratings, I had received special stock awards, and my promotion had just been approved.
How does it feel to go through a layoff?
Layoffs are one of those life events that you think will never happen to you—until it does. When it happens, some thoughts and questions you'll grapple with include: “I did everything right, so why was I laid off?”, “I was doing better than some of my peers, why did they get to stay?”, “I was expecting a promotion, how could they let me go?”, “I feel used”, “Was I laid off because of something I said?”, “Did I do something to piss someone off?”, “Did someone have a personal vendetta against me?”. As much as you might want answers, the truth is you’ll never know the real reason with certainty. You can conclude it was a purely business decision or form a hypothesis about what led to your layoff. Rest assured that others will speculate on the reasons too, but the only right answer is the one that gives you closure.
The emotional intensity of a layoff will depend on how well you’re doing in other non-career aspects of your life. I believe life is composed of five areas we need to develop: career, community, finance, health, and well-being. Since our jobs occupy the largest amount of our time, it’s easy to lose track of what’s going wrong in these other areas. When the job is gone, everything that’s wrong outside of your career gains focus. Whether you’re single, married, going through a separation, have kids, have friends, are sick, or bankrupt—all these things will dramatically impact your mental state at the time you lose your job. However, the stronger your community, the more stable your finances, and the healthier you feel, the better positioned you’ll be to bounce back quickly after a layoff.
When I went through my layoff, I had recently come out of a divorce, which had impacted my community, and other aspects of my well-being. I was just starting to rebuild my life. I had also changed careers before my layoff, and my job had become the biggest part of my life. I was fully invested in my work and was intentional about extracting meaning from it; in many ways, my job was a new home. When the layoff occurred, I found myself without a job, without a purpose, without a stable career, and alone.
Through my experiences, I discovered the meaning of “death by a thousand cuts.” Let me explain: every day you continue to look for a job, it’s like waking up and finding a tiny, almost invisible cut on your body. You find new cuts every single day you keep searching, but these don’t heal. Soon, these cuts start to accumulate, and even though no one else can see them, you know they’re there, and you know that you’re slowly bleeding out. Over time, desperation can set in, and that’s when these little wounds become visible to others. This is why I wasn’t surprised when I saw others making posts asking for help after 6+ months of job searching and constant rejections. There’s no doubt in my mind that at that point, they saw themselves covered in blood when looking in the mirror. This is why I am very thankful that I found a job quickly, and why I spent the entire next year rebuilding every aspect of my life.
How long will the grief last for?
The duration of the emotional turmoil that comes with a layoff is proportional to your perceived value of what was lost. I’ve found that those who simply felt they lost a paycheck were much quicker to detach from the experience and embrace the next opportunity. On the other hand, those who felt they lost a part of what gave their identity—a career or a community—had a much harder time moving on to the next set of experiences.
As with any other type of loss, you will inevitably go through all the stages of grief. Grief, unlike commonly thought, is not linear—you don’t simply go from one stage to the other in a straight line. Instead, grief is like a circle, where you find yourself cycling through the different stages back and forth until you eventually reach long-term acceptance.
For me, it took a little over a year to reach long-term acceptance. Here’s a timeline of how my grief process unfolded and the stages I cycled through:
January 2023: Denial
February-April 2023: Bargaining
May 2023: Acceptance
June-September 2023: Depression
October-December 2023: Anger & Denial
January-February 2024: Anger & Depression
March 2024: Acceptance
April 2024: Bargaining
May 2024 to Present: Acceptance
What strategy should I take if I am part of a layoff?
When it comes to landing your next opportunity, I found that there are two approaches: a fast route and a slow one. The slow route was taken by those who took time off to process their feelings, recover from burnout, and gain mental clarity before even looking for a new opportunity. The fast route was taken by those who pushed through everything and started applying for new jobs as soon as possible, for one reason or another. While I was in the group that rushed to find a new opportunity quickly, I concluded that those who chose to wait a little longer to recover from burnout and process their feelings fared far better in the long run. My advice is that unless you have an urgent need to find a job, to meet financial or immigration obligations, I recommend taking some time to get back on your feet and gain clarity before jumping back into the job search—even if that means taking 1 or 2 months.
How should I structure my day?
Having a job provides a lot of structure in our lives automatically because of the expectations of regular work hours. After being laid off, this structure disappears, and your time can start to feel chaotic, like a poorly managed memory heap. There is no “garbage collector,” so you are responsible for allocating and deallocating space in your calendar at all times. This lack of structure becomes a pain point for many.
The approach I took to solve this issue was to think of myself as if I were in the army, with a set time to get up, a set time to go to bed, and consistent times for meals and exercise. Similarly, I allocated time in the mornings to do LeetCode, and in the afternoons to study system design and apply for jobs. Maintaining a well-known schedule and an organized calendar was very helpful in preserving a sense of order and ensuring I knew what I’d be doing at each time every day.
| Time | Activity |
|---|---|
| 7:30AM | Morning routine and breakfast |
| 9:00AM | Reply to recruiters and schedule interviews |
| 9:30AM | Leetcode |
| 11:30AM | Lunch prep |
| 12:00PM | Lunch |
| 1:00PM | System design |
| 3:00PM | Leetcode |
| 5:00PM | Apply to jobs |
| 6:00PM | Work out |
| 7:30PM | Dinner |
| 8:00PM | Self-care |
| 8:30PM | Networking and relax time |
| 11:30PM | Go to bed |
What should I look for in my next job?
The criteria for finding a job after a layoff should be no different from your criteria when job searching at any other time. There is a common fallacy that financial compensation is the primary and only factor to optimize for when choosing a new job. However, compensation is made up of other factors as well, such as the potential for career progression, the opportunity to work with newer technologies, how well your interests align with the role, and the network of people you’ll build at your new job. How much you prioritize one over the other depends entirely on you, but you should strive not to overlook any of these areas.
One thing I’ve noticed among people who were laid off is that the next job rarely feels like a better opportunity, even if your compensation package increases. This feeling is normal. I believe the reason is that even if you move on to greener pastures, the new opportunity may be temporarily overshadowed by the abrupt loss of previous career dreams, ruptured connections, and the disruption of well-established routines.
How many jobs should I be applying to? How should I track them?
Assuming you’re trying to land a job as soon as possible, a good rule of thumb is to apply to at least 100 jobs per week. In my case, I applied to 20 jobs per day, typically at the end of the day when I was already tired from studying. Today, the number of job applications you can submit per week could be even greater, as many AI assistants can populate the application fields for you. Leveraging these tools will make the process much easier and less time-consuming.
Tracking the job applications you’ve submitted is also an important part of the job search process. Personally, I tracked my applications by creating a table in an Excel spreadsheet where I recorded the company name, job title, URL, and the date I submitted each application. These notes were extremely useful for keeping track of job posting details when recruiters reached out.
How should my resume look? Should I have different versions of my resume?
If you’re looking to land a job as soon as possible, you need to update your resume and start applying immediately. It doesn’t have to be perfect, and you can continue to make gradual improvements while you apply for jobs. Those who have not been active in the job market might wonder whether the format and style of resumes have changed, and the answer is both yes and no. Every few years, new trendy resume designs emerge. However, flashy and trendy designs are not expected or encouraged in most careers, including software engineering. In fact, having a flashy resume can hurt your chances if the information is not easy to parse or if the resume is not ATS (Applicant Tracking System) compatible. Based on personal experience and advice from recruiters, I can confidently say that opting for a traditional resume design will almost always be beneficial.
I also met people who applied to different types of roles simultaneously. I strongly discourage this strategy as you’ll find yourself maintaining several versions of your resume, preparing different pitches for each type of role, and preparing for different types of interviews. Tracking all the jobs you’ve applied for and the types of roles at each company can become overwhelming and may lead to premature burnout. Instead, if you focus on one type of role, you’ll be better prepared for that specific role, sound more genuine and competent, and overall be more prepared.
How should I leverage my network?
LinkedIn is the best tool to reconnect with your existing network and expand it. As soon as you feel ready to apply for jobs, you should enable the “open to work” green banner to indicate your immediate availability. Additionally, make a post to inform your network that your position has been eliminated. When crafting your LinkedIn post, I recommend focusing on informing your network that your job was eliminated and that you’re seeking a new opportunity. Be sure to include the type of role you’re looking for, the experience you have, and the value you can provide. Many people start their posts with a long, grateful ode to their former employer. While these sentiments may be genuine, your post has limited space, and this approach can divert attention from the message that will help you the most.
When applying for roles on LinkedIn, you may sometimes see the recruiter or hiring manager associated with the position. If no recruiter or hiring manager is listed, you can try reaching out to any recruiter actively hiring for the company or a recent, active employee. Below is a template you can use to reach out to them. You can find the original version of this template here.
Hi [LinkedIn User],
My name is [your name] and I’m currently a [role] at [company].
I found a role at [their company] that I believe I’m a good fit for and I recently appllied. The role is [job title + ID].
I understand you might not be the right point of contact for this role, but I’m wondering if you could share my profile with the right team. I’ve been applying and I’m hoping that I get an opportunity soon. I understand you are very busy, so thank you so much for your help!
[your name]
—
Here’s why I believe I’m a good fit for the role:
- [reason from your experience RELATED to required/basic qualifications of the job]
- [repeat 4 more times]
How much money should I have in savings?
There’s a rule of thumb that encourages people to always have a 6-month emergency fund, but I believe this is too little to face a true emergency. Instead, I encourage people to have a 12-month emergency fund to truly achieve peace of mind while you sort things out. The reason is that once your paycheck stops coming in, your financial responsibilities will become top of mind, adding pressure to the job interviews you’re having. Additionally, it will take you about 2-3 months to prepare for interviews, leaving you with around 3 months to land a job before your emergency fund runs out. Fortunately, I found a great opportunity in just over 2 months, but I’ve met many people who went 6+ months without a job or who experienced consecutive layoffs in a short period.
What should you do with your severance package?
After being laid off, you’ll likely be provided with a severance package. In my case, it consisted of two months of regular salary before the termination date, a lump sum payment, and the vesting of stocks for six months. My honest advice is to use this money to cover living expenses and any unexpected life events while you find your next opportunity, then invest any leftovers.
What keeps you going? Where do you draw strength from?
Many people I've met who have been laid off have asked me how to keep going when things don’t go well for a considerable amount of time and rejections start to pile up. The secret is to just keep moving. Pushing through a layoff, or any other difficult life experience, can be managed as long as you keep waking up, getting out of bed, and going through the motions. Even then, many days will feel like failures. To mitigate this feeling of failure, I suggest you establish a small, achievable goal every day, like making your bed each morning or walking for 30 minutes. When you accomplish this small goal, you’ll know that you haven’t given up. This isn’t an incremental win; it’s a consistency win.
For those who are parents, I’ve heard there’s no stronger motivator than doing right by your kids. I don’t have kids yet, so I can't personally comment on this.
How to support someone who just went through a layoff?
If you have a friend who has gone through a layoff, the best thing you can do is reach out and talk to them. There’s something therapeutic about simply talking things through with people you trust. However, don’t make them feel like you’re reaching out because of pity; instead, ensure they feel appreciated. Professionally, you can offer to write LinkedIn recommendations and share job postings that remind you of them.
People going through loss are in a vulnerable state, and you must understand that if someone reaches out to talk, it’s because they trust you. I remember the first time I started doubting myself, about two months into the layoff. I reached out to a good friend during a moment of doubt. I explained the realities of the job market, the challenges I was experiencing, and some of the worries I had if things didn’t improve. But my friend shot me down immediately and criticized my energy. In retrospect, my friend was trying to help by challenging some of the negative thoughts I was having, but I never reached out to him for support again. It wasn’t because of his choice of words—I don’t even remember what was said—but because I now associate him with the emotions I felt during that conversation.
On the other hand, some of my best memories from that time include having tea with a friend and weekly meetings with a mentor and dear friend who helped me strategize, introduced me to people, and helped me process the developments of being unemployed.
What’s the best way a leader could deliver the layoff news in a human way?
I think Microsoft handled the layoffs very well. They allowed employees to retain access to the building and work materials for two weeks to get their affairs in order. During this time, employees were no longer expected to do any work, and it was a reasonable amount of time to retrieve office belongings, say goodbyes, and store all personal documents.
If you’re the person communicating the layoff news, you’ll likely lead a meeting with the directs you’ll be laying off, accompanied by someone from HR to handle legal matters and discuss severance packages. One piece of advice is to be as humane and empathetic as possible during that meeting. You will likely be provided a script to read, and you’ll be asked not to deviate from it. However, delivering the message with empathy and kindness while maintaining eye contact will go a long way for those being laid off. Do not simply read the script off the piece of paper with a dry voice and an expressionless face. Most importantly, do not act as if you are the one whose day has been ruined. While you may not be the person who caused the layoff or planned it, you’re still the executor of it, and your face will forever be associated with the news. The layoff will significantly impact the lives of your colleagues and their families in ways you might not imagine, and your now ex-colleagues will always remember how you made them feel when you delivered the life-altering news.
Biggest Life Lesson
Buddhists say that life is suffering and that the purpose of life is to be happy. In their teachings, the path to achieving happiness and avoiding suffering involves detaching oneself from all possessions and people, including the self. Dissolving the self is a lifelong journey that prompts some to abandon everything and become a monk. There is no doubt in my mind that pursuing life as a monk is both the toughest and most rewarding path available. But for those of us who won’t become monks and who pursue a more Western life, the idea of dissolving the self seems contradictory to achieving a sense of fulfillment.
“You must become the most authentic version of yourself.”
Through a collection of life experiences, I have concluded that to truly achieve happiness in the Western world, you must become the most authentic version of yourself. Particularly, one must always remain true and loyal to one’s core beliefs and perform only what is authentic to you as an individual—no lies, no pretense, no compromise. This is the way of living that I’ve found leads to a life without regrets. Let me make it clear: this is no justification to harm others. In fact, I believe that intentionally causing harm will always find its way back to you.
The importance of becoming the most authentic version of yourself is illustrated by a short Zen story about a young monk who asks an elder about the value of his life. The elder monk instructs the youngster to take a stone from the garden and try to sell it at three different places: a market, a museum, and an antique shop. The young monk follows the elder’s advice, visiting each location. At each place, the stone is valued differently, with offers ranging from as little as $2 to as much as $200,000. Similarly, each of us is valued differently by various people and organizations. But no one will fully appreciate us or the value we provide unless we first embrace, nurture, and become the most authentic version of ourselves.
I still believe there is great wisdom in dissolving the self, and I look forward to pursuing that goal later in life, provided I get the opportunity.
Closing thoughts
Over the past year, I have rebuilt every area of my life from the ground up, including my love life, career, finances, identity, and dreams. Today, I am a software engineer with a track record of building reliable software by solving large-scale and complex technical challenges. I have also learned to lead teams and drive meaningful organizational change by leveraging my previous experiences in product management and technical product management. On a personal side, I feel stronger, more loving, more authentic, and more intentional than ever. At the risk of sounding cheesy, I feel like I’ve started living for the first time.